Should My Aspiring Content Creator Friend Cease Using People for Material?

The Prosecution: One Friend's Perspective

At times I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her Instagram – it’s like a jumpscare.

A close companion of a decade, she, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It can be amusing for a bit, but it weighs on our friendship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to document everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when other people see her posing or filming – I experience secondhand embarrassment. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She creates vlogs about city life, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I don’t want to be involved. On occasion I'm captured while dining, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her feed afterwards, and it comes like a jumpscare: I’ll have no makeup on, making a strange expression or be captured while eating. It’s uncomfortable.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Often I'm in conversation to another person, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has transformed into me being her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she dismissed it. I've been invited to a couple of industry functions, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I resist our friendship to become just a ledger of favours. I don't believe she’s fake or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and film me laughing with another. It’s so silly. I need her to understand that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I love being with her, but I also desire to enjoy it without being recorded, altered, or posted for an viewers. I am not a prop for her Instagram.

The Defence: Marielle

I want my friend to see that the creations we produce together can get us a foot in the door.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online enables me to express myself and engage with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your interests. I look up to people on TikTok who execute that style of informal, self-made film-making.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, posting them with an audience that values the craft behind it. I never intend to make my friend uneasy. Taking her to industry events was my way of sharing opportunities, giving her a chance to witness behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not blackmail, it's simply being pragmatic.

I would take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see what the content we create together can achieve: an opening. I know not all people enjoys being on camera, but often spontaneity is what makes content authentic. Appearing on video from time to time is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she requested, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my private videographer, but friends support one another in small ways. I thought filming a clip now and then would be fun for Beth. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I’d never intentionally humiliate her. But filming together sometimes is part of how I document our time together.

I value our friendship profoundly and want to avoid content creation to come between us. I’m willing to compromise: like requesting permission before filming, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about power, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Obviously making content is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it’s just part of how I experience life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and her friend when they are socializing?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a friend point a camera at you. I understand that it's her passion, but I don’t make friends come to my work. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to create content with. Given the uncertain future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys creating, that doesn't imply all those around her is willing material. She must to respect Beth’s privacy.
Another reader, 26

She may enjoy making content and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everybody. It was kind she has helped Beth’s career, but she needs to hear what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the focus in your friendship. Foster some authentic experiences, where genuine feelings are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

She seems to be not fully engaged nor genuine when they're together – she’s working. Both seem confused as to where the line is. The answer lies not in trying to change one another, but in each establishing defined limits around what is comfortable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
A final view, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their bond?